So Mealyworm picks up my body language and I'm not happy about it. I can't be bitchy anymore. I can't be pissed off about nothing or irritated by typical toddler behavior. I can't roll my eyes at my own stupidity, curse my husband (under my breath) or groan with annoyance at the idiocy of drivers. She's all over me like a fly on poop. She says.."Are you happy, Mommy?" and I pause and wonder...do I tell the truth or do I lie. And then if her behavior in anyway has caused my "unhappiness" she asks "Do you want to be my friend, Mommy?" and depending on the severity of her infraction of the rules OR my own annoyance level...I find myself, again, wondering, do I tell the truth or do I lie?
I'm always tempted to be selfish and shout - "No, I am not happy. I am far from happy. There is nothing right now that is remotely happy. Thanks for asking, Mealyworm."
And as for "Do I want to be your friend?" - "No, I don't want to be friends with a little brat who won't leave her pacifier in her bed like I asked a million times, who eats her big brothers candy that he has hidden in his "secret" spot, who gets into my purse and chews 5 pieces of gum at one time, who hits the cat and pokes her baby sister in the eye. Really, that's not my idea of a "friend." But thanks for asking."
But (usually) I respond - "Yes, Mealyworm, I'm happy. Mommy is just frustrated right now because blah, blah, blah. But I'm happy."
And as for do I want to be your friend? "Yes, Mealyworm, I want to be your friend. I'm happy to be your mommy and I will always be your #1 fan. I am your friend in the truest sense...I'm your mom and will always love you."
I guess sometimes when I think I'm lying, its really the truth deep down.
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3 comments:
Bubba will ask if I'm happy right after I'm done yelling at him or putting him in time out. Most of the time, I say, "Mommy is angry right now, but I'll be happy in a minute." What I really want to say is, "Mommy is angry right now but I'll be happy if you could behave like a decent human being for five freaking minutes and quit irritating the shit out of me."
Would that be bad? :P
MT's is asking if we still her when she gets in trouble. The answer is always "of course I still love you and I always will but just because I love you doesn't mean I like how you are acting"
As for happy, I tend for the truth so I end up saying stuff like "no I'm not happy because blah blah blah" but I'll get over it and then I'll be happy later." She seems ok with knowing that.
funny post! reminded me of "bad mother"...have you read it?
http://www.amazon.com/Bad-Mother-Chronicle-Calamities-Occasional/dp/0385527934
sounds like things are going well for you at home; good to hear! :)
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